Christmas gift

I just found this story and thought it was beautiful:


It was just a small white envelope

It’s just a small, white envelope stuck among the branches of our Christmas tree. No name, no identification, no inscription. It has peeked through the branches of our tree for the past 10 years or so.

It all began because my husband Mike hated Christmas – oh, not the true meaning of Christmas, but the commercial aspects of it – overspending… the frantic running around at the last minute to get a tie for Uncle Harry and the dusting powder for Grandma – the gifts given in desperation because you couldn’t think of anything else.

Knowing he felt this way, I decided one year to bypass the usual shirts, sweaters, ties and so forth.

I reached for something special just for Mike. The inspiration came in an unusual way. Our son Kevin, who was 12 that year, was wrestling at the junior level at the school he attended; and shortly before Christmas, there was a non-league match against a team sponsored by an inner-city church, mostly black. These youngsters, dressed in sneakers so ragged that shoestrings seemed to be the only thing holding them together, presented a sharp contrast to our boys in their spiffy blue and gold uniforms and sparkling new wrestling shoes.

As the match began, I was alarmed to see that the other team was wrestling without headgear, a kind of light helmet designed to protect a wrestler’s ears. It was a luxury the ragtag team obviously could not afford. Well, we ended up walloping them. We took every weight class. And as each of their boys got up from the mat, he swaggered around in his tatters with false bravado, a kind of street pride that couldn’t acknowledge defeat. Mike, seated beside me, shook his head sadly, “I wish just one of them could have won,” he said. “They have a lot of potential, but losing like this could take the heart right out of them.”

Mike loved kids – all kids-and he knew them, having coached little league football, baseball and lacrosse. That’s when the idea for his present came. That afternoon, I went to a local sporting goods store and bought an assortment of wrestling headgear and shoes and sent them anonymously to the inner-city church.

On Christmas Eve, I placed the envelope on the tree, the note inside telling Mike what I had done and that this was his gift from me. His smile was the brightest thing about Christmas that year and in succeeding years. For each Christmas, I followed the tradition – one year sending a group of mentally handicapped youngsters to a hockey game, another year a check to a pair of elderly brothers whose home had burned to the ground the week before Christmas, and on and on. The envelope became the highlight of our Christmas.

It was always the last thing opened on Christmas morning and our children, ignoring their new toys, would stand with wide-eyed anticipation as their dad lifted the envelope from the tree to reveal its contents. As the children grew, the toys gave way to more practical presents, but the envelope never lost its allure.

The story doesn’t end there. You see, we lost Mike last year due to dreaded cancer. When Christmas rolled around, I was still so wrapped in grief that I barely got the tree up. But Christmas Eve found me placing an envelope on the tree, and in the morning, it was joined by three more. Each of our children, unbeknownst to the others, had placed an envelope on the tree for their dad. The tradition has grown and someday will expand even further with our grandchildren standing around the tree with wide-eyed anticipation watching as their fathers take down the envelope. Mike’s spirit, like the Christmas spirit, will always be with us.

Author unknown

Savour Christmas and savour your food

In the mad, busy, run up to Christmas it is easy to get swept up in trying to get through a long to-do list and in trying to keep up with the commercial expectations of Christmas. I think it’s time to slow down, to savour the moment, and to savour our food…

1. If you have kids, try and see Christmas through their eyes – it’s magical! If you don’t have kids around borrow some for a day. A simple piece of tinsel can hold their attention for ages. Cast your mind back to when you were a child. Can you remember how it felt and what was special for you?


2. Think about what you enjoyed about last year’s Christmas season. Ask your family the same. Ask them:

• What do you remember most about last Christmas? 
• What did you like best?
• Was there something you didn’t like about the holiday season (eg too many activites, trying to fit too many people in?) How would you change it?
• If we could only do three things to celebrate Christmas, what would they be?

Try and focus on repeating the good bits and don’t get cajoled into doing the things that are “expected” of you, if you really don’t enjoy them. And take short – cuts without giving yourself a hard time. Talk to people about “obligations” and see if you can find a way around them (a 3 day visit after Christmas may be better than a few hours on the day for example)

3. Enjoy the process. Putting up the tree can be one of the best bits of Christmas, for example. Get the kids to make their own decorations, and I’d like you to let me know what proportion of the baubles you left where the kids hung them and how many you felt compelled to “improve” on! (Perfectionism course coming out next year…)

4. Enjoy each day in the run up to Christmas. Christmas day itself can become an anti-climax. Better to have lots of special moments in the run up to Christmas. Get the kids involved in buying or making presents and wrapping them up. And, if they are crafty, there are loads of things they can do: www.netmums.com/things/Thrifty_Christmas_-_Christmas_Crafts.1757/

5. Make time for quiet time out – a family dvd, board games or just a walk in the crisp air.

6. Make presents as personal as possible. Think of the presents you have treasured most. For me, they are the ones that people have made for me, or have put a lot of thought and effort into. If you’ve got time, hampers are a great way to create something personal. NetMums have some great ideas: www.netmums.com/shop/Christmas_hampers.3611/. Of course, any photo products will be treasured and doing something crafty, such as ceramics, can be priceless too.

7. Try and help someone who is less fortunate. However tight the purse strings are this Christmas, there are many worse off. Donate your time or money to give someone food and love who would otherwise be missing out, visit a pensioner or homeless refuge.

8. Savour your food – one of the best tips for making sure you don’t over-eat during this festive period is to savour every treat. Look at it, smell it, nibble it and let it linger in your mouth for as long as possible. There are no taste buds in your stomach, so you may as well maximise the amount you taste it. Slow down and you will enjoy it more and you’ll be less likely to over-indulge.

9. Plan something fun to do the week after Christmas so that you don't feel any post Christmas let down. Plan to go to an event, take a little trip, or plan a get together with friends.