Create a vision not a resolution

I hope you had a chance to have a break and enjoyed your Christmas period. Now, at the start on 2013, is the time when many people take a fresh look at their lives, and consider the changes they would like to make. I am not a huge fan of resolutions as they don't have a high success rate (let me know if you prove me wrong!) but I do value creating a vision which you take steps towards. I have been creating a vision for both my business and personal life.

Quick Quote
"Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes." ~ Carl Jung

Create a vision and move towards it

• Imagine there is another you sitting in the room next door, close your eyes if it helps, and see what you look like if you are exactly the same as you currently are
• Visualise yourself at Christmas 2013 – notice what is different about you. What have you achieved? Do you look any different? Do you feel any different?
• Explain your progress to your friend - Now imagine a good friend joins you next door and you are discussing the things which have gone well for you in 2013. Notice how you feel about your progress and what they say to you
• Describe your journeys - Your friend asks you how you have managed to make these changes. Describe the steps you have taken and the obstacles you have overcome including what you have learnt
• Clarify your first steps - Explain to your friend the changes you made in January and how you managed to achieve them

Now you have done them once in your head, it should be easier to do it a second time. There are some fantastic tools for embedding your vision and making it more likely to become a reality. I can help you with this and also with defining your vision in the first place and breaking it down into practical steps so that you actually achieve it. Please ring me on 07764 235394 if you would a chat to see how I might be able to help you.

If you would like to share your vision to give you accountability and make it more real, why share it by commenting below?

Will it make your boat go faster?

I had an inspiring weekend last weekend. I went on a training day, the highlight of which was a talk by Ben Hunt-Davis. He won an Olympic gold medal in Sydney in the rowing eight. He told his incredible story and I would like to share the three main lessons I took away.

Quick Quote
"One of the secrets of life is to make stepping stones out of stumbling blocks."  ~ Jack Penn

Suggestions on how to make progress

1. Will it make the boat go faster? This was obviously a literal statement for Ben, but for many of us, it can be a great metaphor for "does it move us closer to our goal?". If you ask this question before any decision on how you're spending your time, it is a powerful way to move towards your goals. For example:

• ​Is is a good idea to click on this internet link? Will it make the boat go faster? Be honest. Are you just getting distracted or procrastinating?
• I haven't got time for yoga today. Will it make the boat go faster? Yes, it probably will. It is unlikely to contribute directly to your goal but if you don't nurture yourself you are likely to hinder any goal. Interestingly, in 2000, the boat team trained less hard than they had before previously unsuccessful competitions, so remember to pace yourself.

2. Never give up. Ben had lost every major competition for the first seven years he was in the GB team. Would you have given up? The key was that he changed his approach, tried new things and carried on.
3. Work as a team. – The ethos of the team was trust and honesty. If feedback needed to be given (or taken), however hard, it was on the understanding that it would make the boat go faster. Communication was key. Is there someone you need to communicate better with?

If you have any suggestions or success stories, please share them below.

Determination is key...keep running...

I can’t wait for the Olympics to start and we are lucky enough to have tickets to a couple of events. The Olympians who are taking part are amazing, not so much because of their natural ability, more for their dedication. Most people are born with much innate ability. Only a few reach their full potential. My passion is helping people reach their potential given their current position (it’s too late for many of us to reach the Olympic stage!) and to achieve their own dreams however large or small. For me it is not about gaining Olympic gold, but about achieving the most you can. In this newsletter I am going to talk about dedication – determination and perseverance. What can we learn from these elite athletes?

This 3 minute video is inspiring (made me cry!): Click here. Let me know what you think by commenting below.


Quick Quote
"The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running." ~ Author unknown
in reference to Ecclesiastes 9:11, "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."


Never give up

​1.       Be clear on why you are aiming for your goal – a strong “why” will keep you motivated when the going gets tough
2.       Surround yourself with people who believe in you and stay away from doubters and nay-sayers
3.       Make some progress every day whilst understanding that everyone has set-backs and that the path is unlikely to be smooth
4.       Don’t break the chain – print off a wall chart with the days of the year on and mark off every day when you make a step, however small, towards your goal. Aim to build a very long chain without breaking it.
5.       Reward yourself for your achievements – time with a friend, relaxation time. And be kind to yourself by acknowledging every effort you make however small.

If you have any suggestions or stories, please share them

The Daffodil Principle

I read this story by Jaroldeen Asplund Edwards a while ago, but it has stayed with me so I decided to share it with you. A very powerful but simple principle...

"Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come see the daffodils before they are over." I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead.

"I will come next Tuesday, " I promised, a little reluctantly, on her third call.

Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and so I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house and hugged and greeted my grandchildren, I said, "Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in the clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see bad enough to drive another inch!"

My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother."

"Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her.

"I was hoping you'd take me over to the garage to pick up my car."
"How far will we have to drive?"
"Just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this."
After several minutes, I had to ask, "Where are we going? This isn't the way to the garage!"
"We're going to my garage the long way," Carolyn smiled, "by way of the daffodils."
"Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around."
"It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience."

After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand-lettered sign that said, "Daffodil Garden."

We got out of the car and each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down the path. Then, we turned a corner of the path, and I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight. It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it down over the mountain peak and slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns-great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, saffron, and butter yellow. Each different-colored variety was planted as a group so that it swirled and flowed like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers.

"But who has done this?" I asked Carolyn.

"It's just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home."

Carolyn pointed to a well kept A-frame house that looked small and modest in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house. On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking" was the headline.

The first answer was a simple one."50,000 bulbs," it read.
The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and very little brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."

There it was, The Daffodil Principle. For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun ~ one bulb at a time ~ to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountain top. Still, just planting one bulb at a time, year after year, had changed the world. This unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. She had created something of ineffable (indescribable) magnificence, beauty, and inspiration.

The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration. That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time ~ often just one baby-step at a time ~ and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world.

"It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years. Just think what I might have been able to achieve!"

My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start tomorrow," she said.

Apparently this story is true and the garden is below Running Springs, California, in the San Bernadino Mountains.

I would love to know what your daffodil garden looks like...

Create your 3 magic words for 2012

Happy New Year!

I have noticed that decreasing numbers of people bother with New Year's resolutions. Those that do, tend to have resolutions based around changing a habit, and there is a big gap between wanting to change a habit and actually doing it. I have two suggestions. Firstly, use NLP to change habits (see later section on current offerings). Secondly create three magic words for your year ahead. Your magic words should be areas of focus, which together form your holistic vision. If you are finding it hard to get focussed after the holidays, this can really help.

Quick Quote

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

Create your three magic words

To create your vision:

• Choose three magic words which will help you focus and create a vision for your 2012. Imagine how you would like to be and make sure they are things which you have not already achieved. My personal words are growth, presence (being in the moment and not worring about the future or thinking about the past) and fun. For my business, my words are courage, persistence and synergy.
• Create a vision board or an audio depending on whether you prefer to see or hear your motivational words. Include your three words and anything else which inspires you. Find or draw pictures which reflect the words you have chosen or create metaphors for your words. Look/listen to it every day. You could even make a screen saver with your three words on.
• Imagine you are embodying your three words. With a clear 3-4 metres in front of you, close your eyes and imagine how you feel and what you see and hear in your current situation. Take 2 steps forward and, saying your three magic words, imagine that you are moving towards them. Finally, take a further 2 steps and imagine yourself achieving your three words. Allow yourself to be immersed. Repeat this exercise when you need a boost.
• Share your words by commenting below. There is nothing like sharing your vision to provide some accountability!
• Let me know how you are doing. I love to hear when you make progress, and of course, I am always happy to help if you are stuck.

If you find any of the above steps hard, give me a ring on 07764 235394 and we can arrange a time for me to help you. I can even help you embody your three words over the phone!

 Let me know what your three words are!

Goal setting

It’s the start of a new decade. A great time to put behind you things that are holding you back, clear some space (in your head and your home), and work out what you would really like to achieve this year. And don’t set a New Year’s resolution – they rarely work. Set a goal which excites and motivates you.


Quick Quote

“The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score.” ~ Bill Copeland

Set a goal

1.Don’t set a New Year’s resolution. Many people set the same one every year and often don’t last beyond the first week. “I want to give up smoking” is unlikely to yield results as it doesn’t have any emotional attachment. Instead try this:

2.Set a goal. You need a real goal, or a vision to motivate you – to keep you alive and to make sure you have something on which to hang your plan. For the smoker, something along the lines of “healthy enough to run around with my kids without getting out of breath” has an image, emotion and a reason behind it. It is more likely to succeed. Make sure youur goal is what you really want, not what you think you should do. Write it in the present tense as though you have achieved it. It should make you excited but a bit scared too.

3.Believe you can achieve your goal. If you don’t believe it then it is unlikely to happen. If this is hard then find other people who have achieved similar goals. Also delve deep to understand what your fears and obstacles are and work out what you need to do to overcome them.

4.Create a plan. Work out what you need to achieve to reach your goal. Break it down into manageable components and then set a step-by-step plan, with deadlines.

5.Share the journey. Work with one or more people so that you are accountable for achieving your action plan, and have support when the going gets tough.

6.De-clutter. Keep you mind focussed on what you are trying to achieve. Try to get rid of distractions and build in sustained periods of time to achieve certain tasks. If you find this hard, yoga and/or meditation can help. When your mind is clear of clutter and your surroundings are neat and orderly, your stress diminishes.

If you need help with any of the above steps, I’m the person to help you…